Melanie Brown on the epidemic of domestic abuse

The death of Melanie Brown's father may have saved her life.

After 10 years in an abusive marriage that she tried to leave multiple times, it was the promise she made to her father on his deathbed that finally enabled Melanie to regain her freedom.

A third of all women have experienced either physical or sexual violence in their lives, either from a partner or someone else. And more than a third of murders of women are committed by intimate partners.

Best known for being a member of the UK band Spice Girls that is synonymous with 'Girl Power', Melanie spoke openly about her own experience to the audience of Breaking Free, an emotionally charged conversation at Davos.

"I just leaned over to him and said, 'Dad, you can pass now peacefully. And I promise you, if you do, I'll go back to America and divorce that monster'. And he just looked at me and took his last breath.

"If it wasn't for that, I don't know if I would have had the courage to actually leave. With my dad, you don't go back on a promise, so I had to follow it through and thank God I did. Thank God I did for me and my kids."

In 2018, the same year as her divorce was finalized, the mother-of-three was made a patron of Women's Aid and wrote a memoir, Brutally Honest, which told her story. In 2022, she was made a member of the Order of the British Empire (MBE) in 2022 for services to charitable causes and vulnerable women.

"Even in this room, there's going to be a lot of women and men here that have been abused, whether it's first-hand or they know a family member or a friend.

"It is an epidemic."

Violence against women is still underreported, largely because women are too afraid to report it.

"A lot of women end up committing suicide or they end up staying. And if they stay, it's a death sentence," said Melanie.

It is on the rise and has reached 'epidemic proportions', according to a 2024 report, which found one in 12 women in England and Wales experienced violence.

The UK Home Office has recognised Violence Against Women and Girls (VAWG) as a national threat to public safety.

The 'prevalence of gender violence' is one of the indicators the Forum's annual Global Gender Gap report uses to measure the health and survival gender gap.

Besides the toll it can take on women's mental and physical health, violence against women can have a huge financial impact on both the women themselves - and on countries.

A 2023 UN report found that, in Switzerland, violence costs more than 8% of the country’s GDP, most of it being associated with domestic violence.

Melanie said that having once been wealthy, with a home in Los Angeles, she had to move into her mother's house during the COVID pandemic.

"I was abused on every platform financially. I had spent 15 years in America, I lived in Australia and I was just destitute. I didn't have a penny."

And she's not alone. Almost a third of respondents in a 2018 Women's Aid study said their access to money during the relationship was controlled by the perpetrator.

"Abuse doesn't have a race, a gender, an age. If an abuser wants to seek you out and abuse you, they will and they will hang on to you for dear life...

"It's like they all read from the same handbook, the same guidebook. They do things at the same time. A few weeks in, you're called irresponsible.

"Maybe you've left your keys somewhere, but you know you haven't. But the keys are then planted at the nail salon or at the gym... and then you start to think, 'Damn, I am really irresponsible'.

"And then they're embezzling your money and forging your signature. And you don't believe that can happen to you."

Work was a safe place for Melanie.

"But then when I went home, it was an absolute nightmare. I was riddled with shame and guilt. I was like, 'Who's going to believe me?' because it was drilled into me that nobody's going to believe me.

"The way that abuse happens, it doesn't just happen overnight. [Abusers] kind of find you. And it can be when you're at your highest. It can be when you're at your lowest and vulnerable."

She became "very good at covering things up... the bruising... the panic attacks".

Globally, awareness of the issue is growing – and legislation and interventions are being put in place. But more needs to happen.

In 2019, WHO and UN Women published RESPECT women – a framework for preventing violence against women aimed at policymakers.

Each letter of RESPECT stands for one of seven strategies: Relationship skills strengthening; Empowerment of women; Services ensured; Poverty reduced; Enabling environments (schools, work places, public spaces) created; Child and adolescent abuse prevented; and Transformed attitudes, beliefs and norms.

Interventions combining economic empowerment and social training are proving effective, such as the Microfinance for AIDS & Gender Equity (IMAGE) initiative in South Africa. Participants reported a 55% reduction in the past year’s experience of physical and/or sexual violence by an intimate partner.

Melanie said for women going through the same experience as her, "the best thing to do is to talk". She's hopeful that by sharing her own experience, it will raise awareness and understanding.

"We need to have an overhaul, not just with the justice system, but with how we treat survivors. Where's the empathy?

"When people say, 'Why didn't you leave him years ago?' to me, like every other survivor, it's impossible. You don't even have access to your phone or a bank account. All your friends have disappeared because they've been isolated from you. Leaving abuse, you've got a lot of repairing to do, not just with yourself, but with your friends, with your family."

She said if people know someone who might be in an abusive relationship, "the only thing that you can do is to reassure that person, I am here for you no matter what. You just have to reassure the person that 'I'm your friend and I'm there for you'."